Dr. Mindy DeSeta is Breaking the Barriers Between Mental Health & Sexual Wellbeing
Mental health and sexual wellness go together like sex toys and… well, you get it. And if Dr. Mindy has anything to do with it, that sex toy is going to be the perfect fit—for your anatomy, your wants and needs, and even your budget. As a licensed mental health counselor with her own practice in the heat of Miami, along with the resident sexologist for XGen Products, Dr. Mindy is on a mission to change the narrative around sex.
“Sex is between the ears, not just the legs,” she states. “Everything impacts the libido. If something affects you mentally, most likely it will have a direct impact on your libido as well.”
What that means in plain language is that if you’re stressed about your sexual performance, you’re more likely to encounter performance-related issues. Not to worry though! “This is something that is easily treatable,” Dr. DeSeta reassures.
Sex is between the ears, not just the legs. Everything impacts the libido. If something affects you mentally, most likely it will have a direct impact on your libido as well.
Embracing the Heat
It’s no accident that Dr. Mindy ended up in Miami. The unapologetic celebration of beauty and sensuality in a melting pot of cultures drew her in like a moth to the flame. After practicing traditional therapy for several years, she quickly realized the profound impact of sexual challenges on individuals and couples alike.
“Everyone can live an enjoyable sex life,” Dr. DeSeta continues. “There are so many stigmas and barriers that prevent people from experiencing the depth of pleasure available to them, or from reaching out for help when that pleasure can no longer be accessed for whatever the cause.”
This revelation led her back to the University of Miami where she obtained her PhD in human sexuality – which happened to coincide with the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic. As the world grappled with lockdowns and loss, Dr. Mindy noticed a trend: a significant drop in libido among her clients, particularly those in their mid-20s to mid-30s. If you’ll recall, it was predicted that there would be a “baby boom” after lockdown, but what Dr. Mindy saw was the exact opposite.
This period of global uncertainty and the anxiety it caused her patients underlined her understanding that libido is directly affected by the state of our mental health. Miami, with its passionate culture and high societal expectations, presented a unique backdrop for these challenges. Dr. Mindy found herself navigating a landscape where performance anxiety thrived, fueled by the perceived expectations displayed in porn, lingering cultural traditions that discourage therapy, and the deep spiritual and religious ties that may handcuff someone to guilt.
Sexpert Witness
Dr. Mindy’s dedication to breaking the stigma around seeking help for sexual challenges is tangible. Not sure about therapy, or need help choosing the right therapist? Dr. Mindy offers free 15-minute consultations with potential clients in order to help find the right fit. Or if YouTube is more your speed, check out her cadre of tips on everything from which sex toy can up your oral sex game, to how to navigate sex with strangers or even that hookup with a friend that you have a lot of questions about. Shattering those stigmas led her to a partnership with XGen as their resident Sexologist. For three years now, Dr. Mindy has brought an educational and mental health perspective to the adult product market, hosting “Ask a Sexologist” nights and reviewing new-to-market products, toys and lingerie.
“I love working with the people in this industry and this is such a fun role,” Dr. DeSeta added. “Every time a new product drops, XGen sends it to me to review so I can help determine what demo it’s best for and help guide people through choosing the right toy for them. Yes, it’s a sex toy, but it’s also a tool for sexual health and can be incorporated into every type of relationship.”XGen even offers courses designed by Dr. Mindy that are enjoyable, bite-sized offerings that cover a range of topics to guide you to a deeper knowledge and understanding of the mental health component related to the products they offer. These courses are engineered to provide a pleasure-based overview of anatomy, sexual response, and ultimately how to help your customers purchase their next perfect product.
Despite the strides made in normalizing the use of sex toys, Dr. Mindy acknowledges the lingering stigma, especially when introducing toys into couple’s play. Her advice: Communication is key. Having an open dialogue about desires and boundaries can transform the experience, making it a journey of mutual exploration and discovery.
Dr. Mindy’s mission is clear: to empower individuals and couples alike to embrace their sexuality with confidence and joy, regardless of stereotypes. By blending professional counseling with a deep understanding of sexual wellness, she is helping to create a world where pleasure and mental health are not just connected but celebrated. Her dedication is paving the way for a future where talking about and exploring sexuality is as natural as sex toys and… well, you get it.
Everyone can live an enjoyable sex life. There are so many stigmas and barriers that prevent people from experiencing the depth of pleasure available to them . . .
